Y05W11PA · Peer Assessment · Year 5

- Choosing What Is Right

WEEK 11 OF 44

This week you wrote a reflection about a hard choice. Now you'll read another student's piece and decide how strong it is. Looking at someone else's work helps you spot moves you can use in your own writing.

Part 1

The Assessor Scorecard for

Reflective Writing – Reflective Piece

Markers look for honest thinking about a real moment that matters. Check each strand below to see what strong work looks like.

Ideas & Content

One named moment, not "a time I felt mixed up." What you saw, heard, and felt in that moment. Real thinking about why it was hard and what it means now.

  • Specific detail: a named moment with details you can see and feel.

Structure & Cohesion

Moment first, then your thoughts and feelings, then the meaning now. Time words like "in that moment" and "looking back" guide the reader. Ideas link because they belong to one journey, not a list.

  • Narrative shape: moment, then thought and feeling, then meaning now.

Audience & Purpose

Honest writing — no pretending or showing off. Share enough so the reader knows you, but choose what you share. No explaining feelings the reader can already see.

  • Authentic voice: honest writing without putting on a show.

Language Choices

Show the feeling — "my stomach tightened," not "I felt bad." Exact words for thought and feeling, not "sad" or "weird." Dialogue, senses, and pacing that pull the reader inside.

  • Precise language: exact words that show thought and feeling.

Conventions

Spelling and grammar that don't trip the reader up. Punctuation that supports the flow of your thinking. Mistakes are rare, so the reader stays inside the moment.

  • Technical accuracy: helps meaning come through, never blocks it.

Part 2

Today’s Marking Targets

Task in one sentence

Write about a moment you chose what was right over what was easy, then reflect honestly on how you feel now.

This is not abstract philosophy. You are writing about a real moment from your own life when you knew what was right but knew also that doing it would be uncomfortable, costly, or difficult. Perhaps standing up for someone. Perhaps admitting the truth when lying would have been easier. Perhaps disagreeing with your friends about something that mattered. Your reflection should show the reader: what was the situation, what were you thinking and feeling at the time, what did you actually do, and what do you understand about it now, looking back?

Let’s Focus

Two strands matter most this week: Ideas & Content and Language Choices. You need an honest, real moment plus exact words to show what you felt and learned. Together they make reflection that rings true.

Ideas & Content

Strong writing this week names one real moment with detail — the place, what you saw, what someone said. It also shows the inner struggle and then real thinking about what the moment means now.

What markers scan for

  • Name one real moment with details the reader can picture.
  • Show what made the right choice hard.
  • Add a thought or line of dialogue from inside your head.
  • Think past the moment — what do you understand now?

Score Bands

  • Basic

    Moment is there but details and inner struggle stay vague.

  • Strong

    Moment is clear, with the struggle shown and real thinking.

  • Excellent

    Moment is vivid, struggle is honest, and thinking is deep.

Language Choices

Strong writing this week shows feelings instead of naming them. "My throat tightened" beats "I felt bad." Exact verbs and one or two senses make the moment feel real.

What markers scan for

  • Pick exact verbs — "hesitated," "wrestled," "finally admitted."
  • Show feelings through what your body did, not "sad" or "happy."
  • Add dialogue that reveals what was said — or not said.
  • Slow down the writing at the moment that matters most.

Score Bands

  • Basic

    Feelings are named with basic words — the reader is told, not shown.

  • Strong

    Feelings show through action and senses, with active verbs.

  • Excellent

    Exact words throughout — feelings shown through action and dialogue.

Now read · Student sample

Choosing What Is Right

Year 5 sample · ~150 words

Student sample for assessment

Written by a Year 5 student in Geelong, Victoria, Australia.

Last term, I had to make a hard choice. During lunch, I saw my friends laughing with popular students. Then I noticed Emma, a girl in our class, sitting alone. I knew Emma felt lonely because she had told me she struggled to make friends.

I had two choices. I could join the popular group and feel more accepted. Or I could sit with Emma, even though my other friends might think it was uncool. My heart was telling me sitting with Emma was right, but I felt scared of what my friends would think.

I took a deep breath and walked over to Emma. She looked surprised, but then she smiled. We talked about her puppy and found out we both liked the same books. The popular group didn't laugh at me. Later, my best friend told me she thought what I did was kind.

Now I think choosing what is right is often easier than I thought. Sometimes people worry that doing the right thing will cost them friends, but often it brings people closer. I learned that my friends care about kindness.

Now apply

The assessment will open in a new tab — keep this page open so you can refer back to the prompt, evidence pack and sample text as you work.

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