Student sample for assessment
Written by a Year 7 student in Coburg, Victoria, Australia.
If you are in a group that is arguing and unhappy, you are not alone. Group conflict usually starts with simple misunderstandings. Someone misses a planning meeting, or forgets what they were supposed to do, or has a different idea about how to solve the problem. No one is trying to be difficult; they just have different information or different opinions. But when someone feels frustrated, they might snap at a group member, and that person feels hurt and snaps back. Before you realise it, everyone is upset and the group is divided into people who support different sides. This happens in almost every group when people are working under pressure. The key to managing conflict is understanding that disagreement is not the same as personal attack. If someone criticises your idea in a meeting, it does not mean they dislike you. They just think a different approach might work better. Once you separate the idea from the person, you can actually listen to what they are saying without getting defensive. The other thing to remember is that conflict usually means people care about the work and want it to be good. If no one cared, there would be no disagreement. When you feel angry at someone, it can help to remember that they probably care just as much as you do. So what can you actually do if your group is in conflict? The first step is to talk. Do not let anger build up by staying silent. Talk to the group member privately if something is bothering you, rather than complaining to others. Be honest about what upset you, but focus on the behaviour or the decision, not the person's character. For example, say 'I felt left out when you decided without asking us' rather than 'You never listen to anyone'. If the whole group is divided, ask a teacher to help you have a conversation. It does not mean you have failed; it means you are being sensible. Some of the most successful group projects are ones where the group asked for help when they needed it. Finally, remember that the conflict is temporary. The project will end and you will move on. Dealing with it respectfully now will make the rest of the group work manageable.