Y07W42PA - What Should Happen to the Land?

This week you wrote a persuasive letter about how community land should be used. Now you'll read another student's letter and decide how strong it is. Looking at someone else's case sharpens what you spot — and gives you moves to use yourself.

Part 1

The Assessor Scorecard for

Persuasive – Persuasive letter

Markers look for letters that balance personal conviction with community awareness. Strong writing shows the position serves broader interests, not just personal preference.

Ideas & Content

Reasons that link personal conviction to community benefit. Each reason explains who benefits and how. Writing shows understanding of real community needs. Not just "I want this" — "this serves us".

  • Community: reasons tied to community benefit.

Structure & Cohesion

An opening that states your position. A body that builds reasons step by step. A closing that invites action. Ideas connect — no jumping between points.

  • Flow: reasons progress logically.

Audience & Purpose

Show awareness of the council's role and concerns. Writing that is respectful, informed and team-minded. Not entitled, not pleading — collaborative. Phrases like "I believe this will serve our community".

  • Respect: tone shows awareness of council role.

Language Choices

Specific, concrete terms over vague language. Not "this is good" — "youth space reduces isolation". Word choice signals confidence and credibility. Language that makes the argument clearer.

  • Clarity: word choice serves persuasion.

Conventions

Standard letter conventions: date, address, salutation, sign-off. Spelling and punctuation that support readability. A pattern of errors lowers the mark — one or two does not. Format that looks professional and reads smoothly.

  • Format: letter layout and accuracy matter.

Part 2

Today’s Marking Targets

Task in one sentence

Write a 270–330 word letter to your council arguing for what the land should be used for, focused on community needs.

Let’s Focus

Two strands matter most this week: Audience & Purpose and Language Choices. Councillors need to see that your position serves the community, not just your preference. Specific, concrete words make your case clearer and more convincing.

Audience & Purpose

Councillors hold decision-making power and need to see how your position serves community needs. Strong responses show respect for the council's role, acknowledge other views, and frame benefits as community ones. Excellent responses also show awareness of wider council concerns — budget, mixed needs, long-term use.

What markers scan for

  • Language that names the council's role — "you are deciding".
  • Benefits framed as community need, not personal want.
  • Awareness of different community members' views.
  • Addresses possible concerns the council might raise.

Score Bands

  • Basic

    States a preference; little awareness of the council's role or community need.

  • Strong

    Frames argument in community terms; respectful tone; some awareness of other views.

  • Excellent

    Frames argument in community terms throughout; collaborative tone; addresses concerns directly.

Language Choices

Specific, concrete language convinces council members. Strong responses use clear terms — "youth space reduces isolation" rather than "it would be nice". Excellent responses use language that is both specific and emotionally true, building credibility without sounding emotional.

What markers scan for

  • Concrete nouns and specific verbs — not "good" or "help".
  • Benefits defined clearly, not in vague terms.
  • Language that sounds confident and informed.
  • Words chosen to build credibility, not feeling alone.

Score Bands

  • Basic

    Language is vague and abstract; words like "good" or "nice" used without clear definition.

  • Strong

    Language is specific and concrete; key terms used precisely; argument is clear.

  • Excellent

    Language is specific, concrete and purposeful; terms consistent; word choice strengthens credibility.

Now read · Student sample

What Should Happen to the Land?

Year 7 sample · \~300 words

Student sample for assessment

Written by a Year 7 student in Bendigo, Victoria, Australia.

17 April 2026 Bendigo City Council Councillor Support Services Town Hall, Bendigo VIC 3550 Dear Councillors, I am writing to urge you to convert the unused land on Chapel Street into a youth recreation space, including a skate park and community gathering area. This decision will directly benefit young people in Bendigo and strengthen our neighbourhood. Currently, there are no safe, designated spaces for young people to gather and engage in physical activity after school. Many of us travel to neighbouring suburbs or stay home. A dedicated space on Chapel Street would give us a place to belong. Young people who have access to organised recreational space are less likely to experience isolation or engage in harmful behaviour. Creating this space is an investment in our community's wellbeing. A skate park and youth space would also draw young people into the neighbourhood, increasing foot traffic and supporting local businesses. Shopkeepers in the area would benefit from the activity and energy that young people bring. This is not just for us - it benefits the whole community economically. Some may worry that a skate park would create noise or require ongoing maintenance. However, managed youth spaces with clear guidelines about hours and behaviour are successful in many councils. Maintenance costs are lower than the social and economic benefits. Other councils have shown that these spaces can operate responsibly. An apartment development would add housing, but it would not serve the specific needs of young people in our area. Bendigo is growing, and we need both housing and spaces for young people to thrive. The council can prioritise the youth space now and plan housing development elsewhere. I believe this decision will strengthen Bendigo by investing in young people. We are part of this community, and we are asking for a space where we can belong. Thank you for considering our perspective. Yours sincerely, Kai Thompson Year 7 Student, Bendigo