Y07W25PA - Should Our School Accept the Offer?

This week you wrote a persuasive letter arguing whether your school should accept a technology company's offer. Now you'll read another student's letter and decide how strong it is. Looking at someone else's work sharpens what you spot — and gives you moves to use in your own writing.

Part 1

The Assessor Scorecard for

Persuasive – Persuasive letter

Markers look for persuasive writing that takes a clear position and supports it with solid reasoning. Check each strand below to see what strong work looks like.

Ideas & Content

A clear position supported by thoughtful, honest reasons. Reasons that actually matter — not weak or obvious ones. Counter-arguments addressed, not ignored. Readers convinced by solid thinking, not just emotion.

  • Reasoning: reasons are thoughtful and honest.

Structure & Cohesion

An opening that states the position clearly. Reasons developed in separate sections with evidence or explanation. A closing that summarises and calls for action. Transitions that help readers follow the argument.

  • Logic: position is clear; reasons are organised logically.

Audience & Purpose

A respectful, professional tone — not aggressive or pleading. The writer treats the reader as a decision-maker. Opposing concerns are acknowledged, not dismissed. Language persuades through honesty, not manipulation.

  • Respect: the writer respects the reader's intelligence.

Language Choices

Specific, confident word choice — not vague or apologetic. Real emotion shows, but no emotional manipulation. Transitions like 'because,' 'therefore,' 'however' guide readers. A tone that sounds authentic, not artificial.

  • Clarity: language is direct and persuasive.

Conventions

Proper salutation, clear paragraphing, correct closing. Accurate grammar, spelling and punctuation throughout. A professional look that builds trust in the argument.

  • Formality: letter format and correct conventions.

Part 2

Today’s Marking Targets

Task in one sentence

Write a letter to your principal arguing whether your school should accept the offer, supporting your position with clear reasons.

Let’s Focus

Two strands matter most this week: Ideas & Content and Structure & Cohesion. Your reasons must be honest and thoughtful — not just convenient. Your structure must let the principal and parents follow you easily. The strongest letters weigh both sides and explain why one outweighs the other.

Ideas & Content

Strong persuasive writing takes a position and supports it with honest reasons that actually matter. The writer may name opposing views and explain why their side is stronger. Weak pieces lean on obvious statements or emotional appeals without logic.

What markers scan for

  • Pick a clear position and state it early.
  • Give reasons that are meaningful and specific.
  • Acknowledge fair concerns on the other side.
  • Connect each reason logically to your position.

Score Bands

  • Basic

    Position is unclear or reasons are weak; the argument does not feel convincing.

  • Strong

    Position is clear; reasons are honest and meaningful; the argument feels logically sound.

  • Excellent

    Position is clearly stated; reasons are thoughtful and specific; both sides are considered with care.

Structure & Cohesion

Persuasive letters succeed through clear structure. Strong work opens with a position, develops each reason in its own section with evidence, and closes by reinforcing the position and calling the reader to act. Transitions guide readers through the argument.

What markers scan for

  • State your position clearly and early.
  • Give each reason its own paragraph.
  • Use transitions so ideas flow, not jump.
  • End with a clear conclusion that calls for action.

Score Bands

  • Basic

    Structure is unclear; reasons run together; readers struggle to follow the argument.

  • Strong

    Structure is clear with distinct reasons; the argument is easy to follow and evaluate.

  • Excellent

    Structure is clear and sophisticated; reasons are developed and connected; the argument builds to a strong close.

Now read · Student sample

Should Our School Accept the Offer?

Year 7 sample · \~250 words

Student sample for assessment

Written by a Year 7 student.

Dear Principal and Community Board,

I am writing to argue that our school should not accept the technology company's offer of free tablets in exchange for data collection on student device use. While I understand the appeal — free technology is attractive — the privacy concerns for young people outweigh the benefits. Here is my reasoning. First, the company would collect data on what apps we open, what content we access, and how long we spend on tasks. This is not anonymous data about general patterns; it is detailed information about individual student behaviour. Even if the company claims not to sell this data, collection itself creates risk. Collected data can be breached, hacked, or misused. Young people cannot change their choices once recorded; the data exists indefinitely. Second, free technology is not actually free. We would pay with our behaviour. That payment is not equivalent. Tablets cost money once; data about our learning behaviour and interests has ongoing value and ongoing risk. We are not in a position to negotiate fairly — the company has resources we do not. Third, our school could pursue other funding. Grants exist for educational technology. Fundraising could happen. The fact that a free option exists does not mean it is the best option. The cost to students' privacy is too high for the convenience of not fundraising. I recognise that tablets would genuinely help learning, and that many schools face budget pressure. But privacy of minors is not something to trade away lightly. We have a legal right to protection. If the school accepts, it signals to students that companies' convenience matters more than our privacy. I urge the board to decline this offer and instead pursue funding that does not require trading student data. Our learning can improve without compromising our privacy. Yours sincerely, A Year 7 student